Deactivated....

I did something for the first time and it happened only the second day of the new year. I don't normally do it and I am tolerant of what people post and what comments lately, but something set me off. It was not just one person, it was some people during the course of a week and a half. I could blame people for me to do it but in the end, I needed a break. There are at times I don't know how to deal with it and that has been a struggle for me for years and years. I listen to what people say because I respect them even if they are blunt to a point or there was something to be point out. But in the end, I deactivated my Facebook account.

One of the things that I really struggle with is, being too sensitive of what people feelings are. I know that some of these should not bother me but at times when I respect people, I don't say anything bad. I rarely say anything bad to anybody. But at times when I feel negativity toward me of what kind of a person of what I say, I get withdrawn and not talk to anybody. I know that is not really a healthy way to do it but at times I need a break. I could blame Facebook and blame people but I can't. I blame myself and the struggle to deal and to understand is confusing.

During the years of bowling, at the time when any team gets in first place, I put pressure on myself that you can't believe. There were people that criticize my game but I let me game do the talking. I could say, Well other people have an opinion and it is theirs but some people get pissed because you are saying something back to them. There are times which I don't know what to do. There are times when I don't want to talk to anybody out of fear they will get offended and hurt. I don't know if being myself is a good thing to people. The more that I think about it, the more I get mixed up. It doesn't bother me of what people post and I never have a problem with it. If it doesn't bother me, then it shouldn't bother anybody of what I post. But in the age of Facebook, people post anything and even take offense of things of what you post.

After 6 years of being on Facebook, maybe it is a good way to step back and have my privacy back. I am still on Twitter so I will keep that open. I don't know when I will be back on Facebook though. It could be next week, next month or next year. We will see.